The desk
«Economy» reporting
items this reporting period: 20 · facts: 0
- UNIT.City Opens Business Season by Rebuilding 2000s Kyiv Out of Working Nokia 3310s and Live Kvas Barrels
- Bank Pekao Extends 5.70% Savings Offer Indefinitely, Erects Permanent Queue Outside Every Branch
- Italy Deploys 8,000 Municipal Clerks to Hunt Down Citizens Who Never Claimed Their Bonuses
- Dollar Rises So High Traders Must Now Wear Oxygen Masks at Currency Desks
- Sammi Cohen's SCN to Broadcast Live From Inside a Cashmere Factory Until Every Viewer Owns a Goat
- Luxembourg's Oldest Bank Sold as a Single Take-It-All Lot, Buyers Must Haul It Away Themselves
- BERD Deploys 900 Bankers to Carry Romanian SMEs Abroad on Their Shoulders
- Meloni Abolishes Car Tax by Physically Removing All Sub-80 kW Engines from Italy
- Bucharest Airport Auctions Off Business Lounges to Highest Bidder, Winner Must Rebuild Them Mid-Flight
- American Savings Bank Opens NYSE Trading Floor Branch, Tells Traders to Deposit Paychecks Before Bell
- Romanian Construction Bosses Demand Payment in Cement Mixers as €3 Billion Hole Swallows National Recovery Plan
- Spain to Deliver Butane Cylinders by Armored Convoy as Price Reaches 18.84 Euros
- CFR Călători Declares National Walking Era: All Trains to Be Pushed by Hand Until Budget Passes
- AirBaltic Grounds Entire Fleet, Turns Riga Airport Into Open-Air Bankruptcy Museum
- Fed Hikes Rates So Hard Gold Flees Country, Oil Follows on Foot
- Postnord Hires 9,000 Retired Postal Workers to Hand-Deliver Every Early Vote on Foot, One Ballot Per Kilometer
- Lavitola's Partner Hauls Entire Life into Prosecutor's Office, Demands They Keep It
- Lagarde Walks the Entire Eurozone Inflation Corridor on Foot, One Apple per Capital, Warning « Le Choc Est Durable »
- Oil Traders Now Required to Run 10 Kilometers Before Every Barrel Bid
- Kaufland Declares Every Romanian Town Must Now Be Built Entirely From Its Own Aisles