Isle Royale National Park Now Requires All Visitors to Get Lost for Eleven Days Before Rescue
After a 70-year-old man survived eleven days in the wilderness, the National Park Service has made the ordeal mandatory for every visitor, with a new fleet of kayakers stationed to retrieve them at the end.
The National Park Service announced that, effective immediately, every visitor to Isle Royale National Park must spend eleven days lost in the backcountry before being rescued by two kayakers, following the miraculous survival of a 70-year-old man who did exactly that last month.
Under the new rule, hikers will surrender their phones at the trailhead and be escorted by rangers to a designated swamp, where they will remain until a pair of kayakers paddles up and asks if they are the person who has been missing. The park has hired 340 kayakers, built 12 new docks, and printed a mandatory packing list that includes one waterproof hat and a positive attitude.
«We realized the eleven-day lost experience is the single most popular thing that has ever happened here», said Superintendent Dana Whitlock. «So we made it compulsory. Visitors who find their own way out will be gently turned around and asked to try again.»
The change has transformed the island. Local outfitters now sell «Day Eleven» greeting cards, the ferry schedule has been rewritten around rescue windows, and a new ranger position, Deputy Assistant for Prolonged Disorientation, has been created to manage the queues of people waiting to be lost.
Whitlock confirmed that the kayakers will receive hazard pay and a commemorative paddle, and that the 70-year-old man has been offered a lifetime pass, provided he agrees to get lost one more time for the ribbon-cutting.
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