AfD Candidate Declares Entire State of Saxony-Anhalt a No-Go Zone for Himself, Campaigns Exclusively by Megaphone from Ladder

MAGDEBURG — AfD regional candidate Ulrich Siegmund has announced that he will not touch the soil of Saxony-Anhalt until his anticipated victory is certified, conducting his entire final campaign week from the top of a 15-meter industrial ladder that his supporters carry through the state's market squares.

«The ground here is saturated with the old regime's disappointment,» Siegmund declared from his perch, gripping the top rung with one hand while the other held a megaphone. «I will not let that history seep into my boots. My platform is above it, literally.» The ladder, welded from reinforced steel and mounted on a flatbed trailer, requires a crew of six party volunteers to reposition between speeches and has already scraped the facades of two town halls in Stendal.

Local authorities have been forced to adapt. The city of Halle has raised its tram wires by four meters along the candidate's planned route, and the state fire brigade has been placed on standby to retrieve the politician should wind speeds exceed 40 kilometers per hour. «We treat it like a mobile construction site,» said a municipal official overseeing the permit, which classifies the ladder as a temporary observation tower. «He is not a speaker; he is a structure.»

Siegmund's schedule now includes a dawn ceremony where he will be winched to the top rung by a crane, a procedure his campaign has named the «Elevation of the Will.» Supporters below wave flags printed with a stylized ladder, and a choir has rehearsed a hymn about ascending beyond the plains of the former East. «From up here I can see the whole betrayal of the last thirty years,» Siegmund added, squinting toward the horizon. «And also the roof of the bakery that refused to sell me a pretzel.»

37Views