New Hampshire Candidate Opens Museum of Her Own Opioid Work, Tours It Hourly
Cinde Warmington, fresh off her gubernatorial primary win, has opened a walk-through museum dedicated to her time as an attorney for Purdue Pharma, complete with hourly guided tours led by the candidate herself.
CONCORD, NH — Cinde Warmington, hours after securing the Democratic gubernatorial nomination, inaugurated the Cinde Warmington Center for Opioid Legacy Studies, a full-scale museum built inside a converted OxyContin warehouse where she personally leads hourly guided tours of her own legal career.
The centerpiece is a recreated 2001 law office where visitors watch a mannequin dressed as a young Warmington argue for patient access to pain medication. The tour then winds through a hall of enlarged deposition transcripts, a diorama of a partner handing her a case file, and a gift shop selling plush replicas of prescription bottles labeled «Miracle Drug.»
«Every visitor deserves to walk the same corridors of professional obligation that I walked,» Warmington told the crowd at the ribbon-cutting, which she performed with a pair of oversized scissors that she then placed in a glass case labeled «The Scissors of Due Diligence.» The museum employs a staff of 23 docents, all of whom are required to memorize her 2001 billable hours and recite them on request.
The Republican Governors Association has responded by chartering a fleet of buses to bring voters to the museum free of charge, hoping the experience will prove disqualifying. Attendance has instead surged, with the facility reporting a waitlist of 4,000 visitors through November. Warmington has announced plans to expand the complex with a nightly sound-and-light show reenacting the 2007 congressional hearings, using volunteer actors from the local community theater.
«I fought for patients, and now I fight for tourists,» she said, adding that the museum would remain open through Election Day, when she expects to greet voters at the exit with a commemorative lapel pin.
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